Gift of the Wheelman

 

[street: Christmastime]

Santa: [voice]  Ho ho ho!  [rings bell]  Give to the needy!  Merry Christmas!
Fraser: [to Dief]
  Now, you stay in the car and keep your nose out of those packages. They’re not for you. [to Vecchio]  He’s searched through every cupboard and drawer in the apartment trying to find out what I got for him, but this Christmas he will not succeed.
Santa: [voice]
  Give to the poor!

 

[store]
Clerk: Well what do you think?
Del: How much is it again?
Clerk: Seventy-five dollars. I have some over here that are less expensive and you really can’t tell the difference.
Del: No, he can tell. He used to have one just like it.
Clerk: It is a beautiful gift.
Del: Okay. Okay, I’ll buy it.

[street; a carload of Santas pulls up]

Santa: [voice]  Give to the needy!  Give what you can! Please make a small donation!  Every little bit counts! Ho ho ho!  Merry Christmas! Open your hearts! Make a wish come true for a child!  Help a needy family!  Do what you can!  Please put a smile on a young child’s face! Please make a donation! Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

[the Santas set up a Salvation Army bucket, synchronize their stopwatches, and enter the bank... they pull out shotguns & take over the bank. Music: ‘Henry Martin’ by Figgy Duff (instrumental)]

 

[street]
Ray: Oh, no, I know that tone in your voice! You think I’m being cheap!
Fraser: No, I think there’s nothing wrong with being frugal, Ray, and if you can’t afford to buy presents, well, getting them for opening a bank account is a...viable if not inventive alternative.

Ray: But you think that I can afford it. You just think I’m just being cheap. That’s what you’re thinking.
Fraser: I think nothing of the sort. Now where are we off to?
Ray: Right here. Savings and Loan.
Fraser: Ah, of course.
Ray: Ah, you see? You see? That’s the tone I’m talking about. You see that tone?
Fraser: What tone?
Ray: That tone. You see it?
Fraser: You can’t see a tone, Ray.

[bank; one Santa outside, with bucket; one on counter covering all with gun; one behind counter grabbing the money]

 

[store; clerk putting gift in a box, while Del counts out his money]

 

[street; bucket Santa get his shotgun out of the car, goes into the bank, and pulls the fire alarm]
Santa1: Stay down!

Bucket Santa: Come on! Move it, move it!

Santa1: What the hell’s going on?

Bucket Santa: Hit the alarm.  Get the hell out of here!

Santa2: More, more!

Bucket Santa: That’s enough, leave it, come on!

[street]
Fraser: Ray.
Ray: Fraser, it’s a fire alarm.

[bank]

Santa1: Come on, come on!

Bucket Santa: Toss me the bag, toss me the bag! Here! 

[Santa2 does, and Bucket Santa tosses his shotgun in return; Santa1 & Santa3 escape out the front door, then Santa2 right after; Bucket Santa runs out the back]

 

[street; three Santas run out the front door just as Vecchio & Fraser arrive]
Ray: Hey, Chris
Kringle, where’s the fire?

[Santa2 points shotgun at Vecchio...Vecchio drops his packages...the shotgun jams... Santa2 jumps into the waiting car with the others

Santa1: Where the hell is he?!
[car peels away; Vecchio pulls out his gun, but can’t get a clean shot... Fraser spots Bucket Santa running away down the alley & chases him... Bucket Santa runs straight into Del coming out of the gift shop, and knocks them both to the ground... Santa’s beard has fallen, and Del gets a good look at him... Santa gets up & keeps running to a getaway car in an alley, and the car speeds away]

Ray: See anything?
Fraser: No. But this young man did.

[27th precinct]
Santa#1: Come on, this is crazy. You know how much money I’m losing right now? Every kid that sits on my lap, I get two bucks.
Huey: Yep.
Santa#1: I can go through forty kids an hour!
Santa#2: I can do fifty.
Santa#1: Bull! No one can do fifty and live.
Gardino: Look, it’s not a difficult question, okay? Where were you at twelve o’clock today?
Santa#3: Hey man, I got three elves that put me in the department store.
Gardino: Yeah. One of those elves said you went out for about twenty minutes.
Santa#3: Yeah well, he’s a lying rat bastard!
Huey: Okay, line up, you six. This way.
  Not, you. What are you waiting for, Christmas? Move it! Yeah, merry Christmas to you, too. Out the door!
Elaine: We’re not interested in how fluffy his beard was!
Witness: That’s him!
Elaine: That’s the sixth Santa you’ve pointed to. Can we focus a little here?
Witness: He had a twinkle in his eye.

[the composite sketch shows a cartoon Santa]
Ray: I don’t understand the problem here. Some citizen pulls the alarm and ran away.
Fraser: But ask yourself who, Ray. All the businesses above were closed. All the employees and patrons were under guard on the bank floor. Anyone coming in would have been noticed by the wheelman. After they took over that building only four people had access to that hallway.

Ray: So, what are you saying, one of the robbers pulled the alarm?
Fraser: Yes!
Ray: That’s ridiculous.
Fraser: About as ridiculous as going to a robbery with an unloaded shotgun.
Ray: I’ll tell you, for a second there, Fraser, I thought I was... Why would a guy pull the trigger of a gun he knew was unloaded?
Fraser: Seems improbable, doesn’t it?
Ray: Yes! You know the wheelman, he knew exactly when the bagman was behind the counter. If he pulled the alarm, they panic. He comes running in, the bagman is trapped behind the counter, he throws the bag to the wheelman who throws him back the gun.
Fraser: Clever, isn’t it?
Ray: Hey, in the heat of the moment I’d take a gun over a bag any day. The whole thing’s a doublecross.
Welsh: Detective Vecchio, Huey, Louie.
  Join me for some eggnog.

[Welsh’s office]
Welsh: The last half hour I’ve gotten calls from seven department stores, the Salvation Army, two parade officials and the director of a children’s pageant. This was further augmented by calls from four city councilmen, the deputy mayor and the police commissioner. They’re all curious as to why we are detaining all the Santa Clauses in the city on Christmas Eve. The police commissioner was especially irked since his daughter was sitting on Santa’s knee in a department store when said Santa was cuffed and thrown into a paddy wagon. In our zeal to solve this case, I can’t help but wonder if we haven’t been, I don’t know, how do you say it... Excessively stupid?
Gardino: Detective Huey and I have a theory, sir.
Welsh: Oh, this I’d like to hear.
Gardino: See we believe the perpetrators were dressed in Santa Claus suits in order to facilitate their getaway by blending into the crowd.
Welsh: In that people don’t usually notice armed men fleeing a crime scene in big red suits!
Huey: Actually they could even have had jobs in local department stores, sir. I mean, that would be the perfect cover.
Welsh: This is your theory?
Huey & Gardino: Yes, sir.

[Welsh is not impressed]
Gardino: It’s not our only theory.
Huey: We have others, sir.
Welsh: Detective Vecchio, do you have a theory?
Ray: Uh, yes, sir. But actually, it’s Constable Fraser’s theory, sir.
Welsh: Oh really?
Fraser: Good afternoon, Leftenant.
Welsh: Oh Merry Christmas, Constable. I assume you’re working on some kind of a North Pole connection?
Fraser: No, sir. And actually it’s a misconception that the North Pole is in Canada, sir. Its ownership has been in dispute ever since Admiral Perry planted a flag there in 1909. A fact that, in itself, is in dispute since many believe it was Matthew Henson, an African-American who first discovered--
Ray: Constable Fraser and I believe the wheelman pulled the alarm in order to throw the whole situation into chaos, thus doublecrossing his partners.
Welsh: Oh sure. Sure. One of the robbers pulled the alarm himself.
Fraser: Yes, sir.
Ray: And we have a witness who saw the wheelman without his beard. We got him out there going over the mug shots right now. If the wheelman’s in there, he’s pretty much in our pocket, sir.
Welsh: All right. Vecchio, you get the wheelman. Huey and Louie you get the other three.
Huey: Yes sir.
[cops exit, and a Santa bursts in]
Santa#4: Which one of your flatfoots took my reindeer?

[interrogation room]
Del: [shutting mug book]
  I looked. He’s not in there.
Ray: Look one more time.
Del: I already did.
Ray: Look kid, whoever this guy is, he’s no first-timer. If he’s done this before, odds are a hundred to one he’s right there in front of you. Maybe he looks a little different, but he’s there. So I need you to look again.
Del: He’s not in there.
Ray: Look kid, I’m having a good day, okay? It’s Christmas Eve. I am filled of love for my fellow man, but I swear to god if you don’t look again, I’m gonna slap you upside the head.
Fraser: Ray. May I?
  Del, why don’t you just describe the man you saw.
Del: I didn’t get a good look.
Ray: The guy was three inches from your face. It doesn’t get any better than that!
Fraser: Uh, Ray, maybe Del is just afraid of what will happen if he identifies this man.
Ray: Well, maybe Del should be afraid of what’ll happen if he doesn’t. Look kid, you’re not the only one who saw a face. This guy was so close to you he could count your pores. How hard do you think it’ll be for him to find out where you live? You put the finger on this guy and we can protect you but if you don’t--
Fraser: We’ll still protect you.
Ray: Maybe he will, but I won’t, and no other cop will, either.
Del: You really were touched by the spirit of Christmas.

[corridor]
Ray: The kid’s making a big mistake. [Fraser picks up a wrapped package]
  What’s that?
Fraser: It’s a gift.
Ray: I don’t know, maybe I was too hard on him.
Fraser: Yes.
Elaine: Hey, guys! They pulled a palm print off the countertop. Your bagman is Robert L. Flannigan. FBI have him linked to six bank jobs with James and Cameron Donnelly.
Ray: No kidding!

[a reindeer walks by, behind Vecchio & Elaine]
Fraser: Is that significant?
Ray: Well, the
Donnellys are something of a local legend around here.
Elaine: They had a partner named Nick
Stalidis.  Rumor had it he skimmed a small amount money from them. He took off to Mexico. The federales found him in bite-sized pieces in the Sea of Cortez.
Ray: There’s only two rules written in the pavement in this town. You don’t steal from the mob and you don’t cross the
Donnellys.
Fraser: Mmm...I think I should return this gift.
Ray: Oh that’s good, Benny, we only have a couple hours to find the wheelman before they turn him into fish food and you’re delivering Christmas presents?
Fraser: Thank you, Ray.

[Del’s apartment; he enters to find it’s been ransacked; he gets spooked and runs to alley...right into--]
Jimmy Donnelly: Hey, hey. Hi Del.

Del: Hi.

Jimmy: Came looking for your dad. He wasn’t home.
Del: Yeah.
Jimmy: You tell him Jimmy Donnelly dropped by, will you? Tell him I expect to meet him tomorrow at the distillery as planned. Will you do that for me?
Del: If I see him, yeah.
Jimmy: That’s a good boy. [exits]

[alley; Del is taking out trash]
Fraser: Hi, Del.
  You left this at the station.
Del: Thanks.
Fraser: I’ll give you a hand with this. [sees manuscript in the trash]
  William Porter. Is that your father?
Del: Yeah.
Fraser: A writer is he?
Del: Not really.
Fraser: My father was quite the writer.
Del: Professional?
Fraser: No. A Mountie. But he kept journals. He must have filled up... almost a hundred. You know it’s odd. We never spent all that much time together when I was young, so it’s only recently through his writing that I feel as though I’ve gotten to know him.
Del: Is he dead?
Fraser: Yes.
Del: Sorry.
Fraser: You know, I’ve always thought it was the bravest thing a man could do. Writing down his innermost feeling so that any stranger could read them.
Del: Well, I’m the only stranger to have read any of these.
Fraser: Mind if I read ‘em?
Del: Suit yourself.
Fraser: Oh, uh, the gift. Is that for your father?
Del: Yeah.
Fraser: I’m sure he’ll treasure it.
Del: It’s nothing.

[Riv]
Fraser: He wasn’t scared. He knew the thief.
Ray: Did he I.D. him?
Fraser: Yes. He just didn’t intend to.

[27th precinct]

[‘Elf’ smacks Gardino in the kneecap with a cane]
Gardino: Ow!
Elf1: I told you everything I know about it!
Gardino: Just a few more questions, okay? Please. [to others]
  Come on, come on. Hurry up, let’s go.
Elf2: Hey, what do we look like, rats?
Gardino: Don’t push me.
Ray: [on phone]
  Right...Okay...Thanks. [hangs up]  Parole officer says Porter’s been a model citizen. Worked as a janitor past six years. No complaints. Never missed a day’s work. You got that, Elaine?
Elaine: Got it.
Ray: He’d come home, he’d take care of his kid, then he’d spend half the night writing short stories.
  Something he picked up in prison, I guess.
Fraser: And the boy’s mother?
Ray: Left him with an aunt about eight years ago and did a bunk. When he finally got out, he took the kid back.
Elaine: William Sidney Porter, pled guilty to one count of armed robbery. He was the driver. Served seven years, released on good behavior. Nothing since.
Fraser: Doesn’t make any sense. Why would he leave his son?
Ray: Fraser, this may come as a shock to you, but here in the United States of America, we’ve discovered bank robbers aren’t usually the best family men.
Fraser: He leaves prison. He reclaims his son. He works six years at a minimum wage job.
Elaine: [answering phone] Twenty-seven. Elaine
Bessbris.
Fraser: This isn’t a man who would abandon his life without an awful lot of thought. When the
Donnellys found out he betrayed them, his son would have been the natural target. I don’t think he’d have left him behind unprotected.
Ray: Maybe he acted on impulse.
Fraser: No, no. I think he has a plan. We just don’t know what it is.
Elaine: Thanks. [hangs up]
  Porter’s passport expired last month. No request for renewal.
Ray: So where’s he planning to go?

[Riv; stakeout]
Ray: [on cell phone]
  I brought the wire tap request over in person, sir, but His Honor had consumed a great deal of Christmas cheer and started cursing at me in Norwegian! ...I wasn’t aware that he spoke it either, sir...I’d appreciate that...Right.  [hangs up & eyes Dief]  Did you have to bring him?
Fraser: Well it is Christmas Eve, Ray.
Ray: What are you reading?
Fraser: My father’s journals. I’m just going over old cases to see if there’s anything similar.
Ray: Is there?
Fraser: Not that I’ve found.
Ray: What is it?
Fraser: I just wish I’d spent more time with him. There’s a lot of things I should have learned.
Ray: I learned two things from my father. One: timing. Mostly when to duck.
  And two: you never hit a kid, cause it doesn’t teach him anything. I’m going to go to the gas station. I’ll be right back. [exits, with Dief in tow]

Robert Fraser’s Diary: Sam Dalton made only one mistake. He planned everything but how he was going to spend the money. Before he’d hit Whitehorse, he left a trail of twenties that took me right to his door.
Robert Fraser: That Sam’s case was nothing like this.
Fraser: No, I know, but what I can’t seem to find is--
Robert Fraser: Hello, son.
Fraser: Hello, Dad. How are you?
Robert Fraser: I’m dead, son. Other than that, do you mean?
Fraser: No, that’s what I was asking.
Robert Fraser: Oh, that’s good. Never be ashamed to ask a stupid question, son. I taught you that, didn’t I?
Fraser: Not specifically, no.
Robert Fraser: Well, no time like the present. So fill me in on the case!
Fraser: The case.
Robert Fraser: The case. the case you’re working on. Something bothers you about it.
Fraser: Well. In a nutshell: there was a bank robbery today. Now we’ve identified the perpetrators.
  But the wheelman, that’s ‘the driver’ in Chicago parlance, doublecrossed his partners. Now what we can’t seem to figure -- is there any insanity in our family?
Robert Fraser: No. Not that I’m aware of.
Fraser: Good.
Robert Fraser: Well, there was your Uncle Tiberius, who died wrapped in cabbage leaves; but we assumed that was a freak accident. Go on, go on!

[Donnelly’s place]
Jimmy: You took your time, Robert. Doing a little Christmas shopping, I see.

Robert: Check this. Porter had a second car parked in an alley about a block away.

Jimmy: Really. Cameron, have to apologize to you. Seems Porter isn’t planning on sharing after all.
Cameron: Apology accepted, James.
Jimmy: Oh, Robert. I meant to ask you. Why did you toss Porter the bag?
Robert: I was trapped behind the counter, man. The cops were coming.
Jimmy: So instead of running around the counter, you threw the bag and jumped over.
Robert: Yeah!
Jimmy: Well, it makes sense.
Robert: I was thinking of getting out with the cash, you know?
Jimmy: But you didn’t, did you? You’re the bagman, Robert.
  You’re supposed to carry the bag.
Robert: Hey Jimmy, Jimmy, come on, man. He threw me the gun!
  I mean, the alarms were going off!
Jimmy: No, no, I understand. Everyone gets one mistake. And that was yours.

[shoots Robert dead]

Jimmy: [to Cameron] See what he got us.
Cameron: Far Side calendars.
Jimmy: Oh, I love those! Now let’s see what young Del got.

[Riv]
Fraser: So did you just happen to pick this moment to reappear?
Robert Fraser: Well, obviously you needed my help, son. And it was my fault. If I’d better prepared you, you wouldn’t be floundering around like this.
Fraser: Well, I’m not completely over my head, Dad, I mean I--
Robert Fraser: Don’t try to make me feel better, son. I failed you as a father. I’m gonna make that up to you now.
Fraser: How exactly do you propose to do that, Dad? I mean it’s not as-–
[Vecchio gets in]

Ray: Anything happen?
Fraser: In what sense?
Ray: There’s a light up there. And it’s condemned!
Fraser: Stay.
Robert Fraser: Me?

Fraser: Him. [indicates Dief]

Robert Fraser: Benton, Benton. See how fast he noticed that? Observation is everything, son.
Fraser: Thank you, Dad.

[alley; Vecchio tries & fails to kick down the door]
Ray: Around
  back.
Fraser: There!
Ray: Police! Freeze!

[exchange of gunfire. Music: ‘Rumbolt’ by Figgy Duff.]
Robert Fraser: Count to three and rise up together shooting.
Fraser: I don’t carry a weapon.
Robert Fraser: You what?
Fraser: I don’t carry a weapon.
Robert Fraser: Is that smart, son?
Fraser: It’s the law, Dad.
Robert Fraser: Well, no time for niceties. Here, use mine.
Fraser: Well, I appreciate the offer, but it’s imaginary.
Robert Fraser: Oh, so it is.
[more gunfire]
Ray: This is my last clip.
Robert Fraser: They’re maneuvering for position.
Fraser: I can see that.
Ray: See what?
Fraser: They’re maneuvering for position.
Ray: I can see that.
Robert Fraser: Only got a few seconds left.
Fraser: Right again.
Ray: About what?
Fraser: We’ve only got a few seconds left.
Robert Fraser: What you need son, if you don’t mind me saying, is a good solid plan. [Fraser picks up a rock]
  Or you can just throw a rock.
Fraser: Fire your entire clip on three.
Robert Fraser: Then he’ll be out of bullets.
Ray: Then I’ll be out of bullets.
Fraser: I heard both of you.
Ray: Is there an entire conversation going on here that I’m totally unaware of?
Fraser: Yes. One. Two. Three.

[they rise up, Fraser throws, hitting a man, Vecchio shoots, chasing the rest away]
Robert Fraser: At least you found the villains, son. There’s something to be said for that.
Fraser: Thank you.
Ray: Anytime.

[27th precinct; interrogation room]
Ray: We know your father did it. We know he has the money, and we know that you know where he is. What we don’t know is how smart you are.
Del: I can’t help you.
Ray: Now we know. Benny, talk to him. Ask him if he noticed the men with guns that were coming after him. You’re father left you hanging, kid. Maybe you should stop worrying about him and start worrying about yourself. Tell him that, Benny.
Fraser: I will, Ray.
Ray: Yeah, you do that.

[Vecchio exits, and several men dressed as Elvis stroll by]

Gardino: Hey, I said elves, you morons! Elves!

[Fraser shuts the door]
Fraser: Del, I know you want to help your father. You wouldn’t be much of a son if you didn’t. The only way to protect him is if we can bring him in off the streets. Now it took us several hours to identify your father, during which time he could have easily left town, but he didn’t.
Del: You don’t know that.
Fraser: Yes, I do. He wouldn’t leave you. And yet, he didn’t get you out of town before the robbery. Or arrange to meet you someplace else.
  Now why is that?
Del: Well, maybe his plans just didn’t include me at all.
Fraser: Well, I don’t believe that. And I don’t think you do, either.
Del: Think again.
[Vecchio enters]
Ray: Talk to him?
Fraser: Yes.
Ray: Look, kid, we all didn’t get the best fathers. And yours, well, he ain’t going to win any parenting awards, but he’s all you got.
  So are you going to help him or what?
Del: He’s gone by now.
Ray: Then you can go. [Del gets up slowly]
   Just check out at the front desk before you leave.

 

[corridor]
Fraser: We can’t just let him go back out there.
Welsh: All right. Keep a close eye on him. If you’re right, his father will try to contact him again.
Fraser: We’re to use him as bait?
Ray: Something we like to do every Christmas.
Welsh: Don’t lose him, and don’t let the
Donnellys get him.
Ray: Oh, I’ve gotta call my ma and tell her why I’m gonna be late. Meet you out back.
[another reindeer walks by]

 

[another corridor]
Robert Fraser: I never taught you how to interrogate a witness, son!
Fraser: Uh, no.
Robert Fraser: The seven ways to tell if a man is lying.
Fraser: Well, I kinda pieced it together for myself.
Robert Fraser: Oh good. So you know what to watch for in their eyes?
Fraser: Yes--
Robert Fraser: You know if they look up and to the right, they’re lying?
Fraser: Uh-huh.
Robert Fraser: Unless they’re aware of that, in which case they try to look straight at you?
Fraser: Yeah.
Robert Fraser: Or they overcompensate and end up looking down and to the left?
Fraser: Oh really? Would you mind waiting here? I’ll be right back.

[Riv; Fraser jumps in]
Fraser: Drive, quick! Before he comes back.
Ray: Who?
Fraser: My father. Drive. Go!
Ray: Fraser, your father’s dead.
Fraser: I know. And I don’t mean to speak ill of him, it’s just...he’s driving me nuts.
Ray: Your father.
Fraser: He’s not really here. I know that. It’s all in my mind. It’s just, he refuses to stay there.
  Or rather he refuses to leave there. I don’t really understand it, but I’ll tell you it’s beginning to wear a little thin. I mean, does he think I’m completely ignorant?  I-I-I mean, next thing he’s gonna do, is try to show me how to start a fire. You know, Ray, I got half a mind just to tell him to pack up, move out.
Ray: Of your mind.
Fraser: Yes.
Robert Fraser: Hello, son.
Fraser: [mutters]
  Oh God, he’s back.
Robert Fraser: What’s that?
Fraser: I said glad you’re back, Dad! [aside to Vecchio]
 Not a word, all right?
Ray: Hey, no problem, Benny.

[car picks up Del & speeds away]
Robert Fraser: That’s him!
Fraser: Who?

Ray: What?
Fraser: There.
Ray: Where? [Fraser points]
  Right in front of the police station? Now that is cheek.

[car chase… Porter, Vecchio, and police cruisers speed down city streets... Music: ‘Steaming’ by Sarah McLachlan.  Porter eventually loses them and pulls into a vacant lot]

 

[under an overpass]
William: We got a few minutes.
Del: I don’t need to hear any excuses.
William: Will you just listen to me?
  If something happens to me, I gotta know--
Del: Dad, I don’t want to hear this!
William: If something happens to me, you gotta know where I hid the money.
Del: I don’t want the damn money!
William: I don’t care what you want!
Del: There is a surprise, huh?
William: Just listen to me. I don’t know how this thing is going to turn out.
Del: Dad, you said you were finished! You know, you promised--
William: Del, Del, Del, I didn’t want to do this. Just listen, just listen to me! If something happens to me, I gotta know that you’re okay.
Del: That I’m okay, huh? Now you think of this?
William: Don’t talk to me that way!
  I’m your father.
Del: You’re a loser! That’s what you are. You couldn’t make one damn thing work out for yourself, not one! So why should I listen to one thing you have to say?
William: Del! [Del runs off]
  Del! Del!

Fraser: You won’t get away with it. I know you must have a plan, but there’s no way it’ll work.

[William drives away]
Ray: Now there’s a man who loves his work.
Fraser: I don’t think so, Ray.

[diner]
Fraser: You sure you don’t want something?
Robert Fraser: No thanks, son. I couldn’t. Well, this is the first real Christmas dinner we’ve had together in twenty years, and I’m not even really here.
Fraser: Aren’t you?
Robert Fraser: I don’t know any more about this than you do, son. Am I here? Am I in your head? You in mine? Damned if I can figure it out.
Fraser: Well, finally. Something you don’t understand.
Robert Fraser: Well there’s lots of things I don’t understand, Benton! How I lived all those years and didn’t get to know my son.
Fraser: You know, I should be able to see his plan. I mean, there aren’t that many variables. But no matter which way I twist it, I can’t seem to see how he thinks he’d get away with it. I mean you don’t doublecross your partners then stay around town. You don’t plan a getaway and forget about your son.
  [pause]  Unless you don’t plan on getting away with it.
Robert Fraser: How do you mean?
Fraser: It’s the only thing that explains his actions.
Robert Fraser: I don’t follow you.
Fraser: No one would plan a doublecross this intricate and leave the getaway to chance. He *did* plan it through. He knew exactly what he was doing, and he is *not* planning on getting away with it.
Robert Fraser: Nobody plans to fail, son, it doesn’t make sense!
Fraser: If it’s the only logical solution, it doesn’t have to make sense.
Robert Fraser: What the hell does that mean?
Fraser: Don’t you see it?
Robert Fraser: No!
Fraser: Of course you do. It’s obvious.
Robert Fraser: I don’t!
Fraser: Really?
Robert Fraser: No.
Fraser: You don’t?
Robert Fraser: No.
Fraser: Oh.
Robert Fraser: But you do. Go bring him in, son. That’s what I taught you.

[Fraser leaves, and clerk runs quickly to lock the door behind him]

[Riv; stakeout. Fraser arrives]
Fraser: Anything happen?
Ray: In what sense?
Fraser: Is Del still in there?
Ray: Yeah, yeah.

[Fraser exits]
Mr. Vecchio: Twenty-four hours and you still haven’t solved the case.
Ray: Come on, Dad, it’s Christmas day!
  You want to give it a rest?
Mr. Vecchio: Hey, if you don’t care about your work, it’s fine with me.

[Del’s apartment]
Del: First time he went to prison, I was six years old. I actually thought it was my fault. I thought if I didn’t ask him for all those kid things kids ask their fathers for, you know like bikes and toys or whatever, that he wouldn’t go out and steal and get them for me. When he got out, I was so careful not to ask him for anything. Cause I thought that if I did, he’d go out and do something like this again. You know, all I ever wanted was to have him here with me.
  But it didn’t matter what I wanted, did it?  He didn’t give a damn about me.  He didn’t even tell me about this, he just went out and did it! Well, you know what? This isn’t my fault, and he’s not my responsibility. He can go back to jail. He can go to hell for all I care.
Fraser: Oh, he isn’t going back to prison, Del. That’s not his plan at tall. He’s going to let you know where the money is. Then he’ll kill the
Donnellys, then he’ll kill himself. He’ll make it look as though the money was destroyed. You’ll get it all. He’s planning to die. And he’s doing this for you.
Del: You know when I was most proud of him? [pause]
  What do you want me to do?

[Riv]
Fraser: [to Vecchio]
  Let’s go.

 

[Music: ‘Henry Martin’ by Figgy Duff]

[William pumps gasoline into cans; Del thinks about Dad’s manuscripts; Vecchio & Fraser drive]
Ray: Distillery. Something closed down or abandoned.

[William setting up something in warehouse with gasoline & 50-gallon drums]
Elaine: [voice]
  O’Hare and Sons Distillery closed about ten years ago. South side.
Fraser: Thank you kindly, Elaine.

 

[Donnelly apartment/distillery]
Jimmy: [answering phone]
  Hello.

William: I’m here.

Jimmy: Well, you’re a man of your word, William. Good show. [hangs up; then to Cameron]  Bring me that big gun I like. I almost never get to use it.

[a child slips a card underneath Del’s apartment door; Del reads a letter from his father, then burns it]

 

[distillery; Vecchio drops Fraser off]

Ray: Okay, you got two minutes, then I’m in there.
[door is locked, so Fraser goes in another way; finds William pouring gasoline all over the floors... Fraser jumps down and William pulls out a lighter]

William: You’re one unlucky Canadian.
Fraser: I’d be careful if I were you. I think you’re standing in a pool of gasoline.
William: I’m not interested in killing you. If you want to walk, I’ll let you.
Fraser: I can’t do that. You know, it took me a while to figure out what you were doing. One doesn’t ordinarily equate crime with self-sacrifice.
William: I guess I’m going to have to take my offer back.
Fraser: You went straight, William. A long time, six years.
William: I love how people like you think that earning four dollars an hour is great and noble. I couldn’t afford to buy my kid a Christmas gift. That’s not noble. It’s pathetic.
Fraser: I don’t think your son would have seen it that way.
William: You know what my son saw? He saw a sap who worked twelve hours a day at a job he hated, and then came home and worked another six hours at a job that nobody wanted to pay him for. The only thing I ever showed my kid was how to be a loser.
Fraser: And you thought robbing a bank would win his respect?
William: Respect? Oh. Oh, I haven’t thought about that in a long time. All I wanted was three dollars. Three dollars for the whole year and
I’da made it. I was standing there at the counter with his gift in my hand. The girl says to me ‘you’re three dollars short.’  I started laughing. I laughed so hard I thought I was gonna have a heart attack right there in that department store. I suddenly realized that if I died right then and there, I’da left my son 62 dollars, some lousy manuscripts, and a lot of excuses.  And that’s not good enough.  That’s-that’s not enough to leave your son!
Fraser: You know, William, I think there’s only one thing that a father needs to leave his son, and that’s a good example of how a man should live his life. Anything else the son can learn for himself. The greatest gift my father ever gave me was the courage to trust my own abilities. And I learned that through his example. You know, you can give your son anything you want. But if you don’t leave him a good example of how to be a man, you leave him nothing. That’s what you’ll leave Del. Nothing.
Ray: Put the lighter away, William.
  You don’t want to do this.
William: You stay put!
Ray: Nobody has to die here.
Jimmy: Now look at this, Cameron. It’s a Christmas party.
Ray: Drop the gun!
Cameron: Stuff it.
William: Jimmy.
Jimmy: Now you weren’t being totally frank with us, were you, William?
William: You want to kill me, Jimmy? You want to do that? Go ahead.

[releases a rope, spilling gasoline all over everyone but him & Fraser, then lights a rag stuffed into a bottle]
Jimmy: That erector set I got you last Christmas was obviously a mistake.

Ray: You can’t get away with this.
Fraser: Actually he can, Ray. Everyone involved in the robbery will die, so his son is safe from retribution. There’s enough cash in that bag to convince the forensic experts that the money was destroyed in the blaze. The police will stop looking for it. All he has to do is drop that bottle. He gets away with it.
Ray: Thanks for backing me up on this one, Benny.
Fraser: Sorry, Ray. It’s your decision, William. Do you leave something for your son, or do you steal from him?
William: Drop it. Drop it! [Jimmy & Cameron drop their guns, and Vecchio starts to drop his, too]
 Not you, you moron.
Ray: Sorry.

[prison visiting room, through glass]
William: Hi. Looks like I screwed up our Christmas plans.
Del: Yeah. It’s okay.
William: US Attorneys agreed to three to five.
Del: That’s good.
William: You’ll be a man before I get out.
Del: I’ll be all right. Aunt Celia’s cool about it, you know.
William: I’m sorry, Del. I’m really sorry.
Del: I got you something, Dad.

[hands package to guard; it makes its way to William]
William: [to guard]
  Thanks. [opens it – it’s a pen]  It’s beautiful. It must have cost you a fortune. I used to have one just like this. You were six then. How do you remember that?
Del: I used to watch you write. You know I’d think, uh, ‘that’s my dad.’
William: I didn’t get you anything, son.
Del: Yes, you did.

[Fraser’s apartment; Fraser’s in bed]
Fraser: You know, I think you’re wrong about Sam Dalton. The cases weren’t entirely dissimilar. Dad? You still here?

[Fraser turns over & closes his eyes]
Robert Fraser: Merry Christmas, son. Merry Christmas.

 

End

 

 

Main Index

Season 1

Season 2

Season 3

Season 4

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